THE MEXICAN AMERICAN TRYING TO LEARN KOREAN

holy crap! not only Korean but in JAPANESE?!

Sat, 07 Mar 2009 00:19:06 GMT

Ok, So I was trying to open my dailymotion video to see some video which... I shouldnt see but w/e. And I decided to find out if I actually had a dailymotion account since my stupid login wasnt logging in so I typed Xiahnsaya1004 which is the name that I now use online ^^
so a bunch of random crap came up I said during the 2 year span I been using that name and then something caught my eye

네이버 인조이 재팬 :: 한일 생활문화 교류의 중심
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비교하지 말란말야. (어딘가 나라의 사람의 어딘가 언어를 이용, 기계번역을 이용해 영어로 남긴 댓글이라 번역하는데 상당히 애로사항이 꽃핀 댓글) xiahnsaya1004 ...

I was like O.o Naver... and my sn and the word 엉어 which is English in Korean I was like WTF is this.

So I opened it

격돌 ! "K팝이냐 J팝이냐 !" (WD) | 음악 조회 508|공감 0
번호107925|작성자KOREAjounho200|작성시간 2008-03-08 21:19:28
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한국의 K팝과 일본의 J팝을 직접 비교하는 비교 동영상이 유튜브에 올라와 벌써 10만 뷰를 넘는 뜨거운 관심을 받고 있습니다.

아래는 유튜브 네티즌들의 관련 댓글들입니다

Out of that I understood Kpop and Jpop youtube netizen

So I scrolled down
and I FOUND MY SN

xiahnsaya1004
비록 앞으로 J팝이나 J락을 듣겠지만 난 그래도 K팝이 좋아.
그치만 역시 K팝!
동방신기!!!! 만세!! 완전 좋아!!!

It said something about Kpop and TVXQ being awesome!
I WAS LIKE WTF .... so I tried finding the video in english to see wtf I had said and I found that someone in Japanese had translated the same thing but in Japanese!~!!!!!

xiahnsaya1004
たとえこれからJ-POPやJ-Rockを聞いたとしても
それでもやっぱりK-POPがいい。
やっぱりK-POPよ。
東方神起!!万歳!!めちゃくちゃ好き!!

http://enjoyjapan.naver.com/tbbs/read.php?board_id=tpop&nid=984142 the korean

http://www.gesomoon.org/modules/weblogD3/details.php?blog_id=804 the japanese

there you go so thats it

My project of love for DBSK Dong Bang Shin Ki 나 는 반 설아

Sun, 20 Apr 2008 12:58:10 GMT

나는 반 설아 그리고 동방신기 사랑해요!

PORTUGUESE >> HMONG IN THE FUTURE

Sat, 19 Apr 2008 15:50:47 GMT

A escuridão residia em meu coração e o rancor pecaminoso possuiu minha alma. Até a ultima gota de esperança e felicidade se havia desaparecido para sempre, isso era que eu pensava. Da escuridão veio a luz e essa luz me trouxe momentos escondidos que eu havia colocado e guardado muito longe do meu ser.

Buscando por todos os lados para ver se podia encontrar a eu mesma, mas não pude, mas depois Deus me mandou 5 cantores coreanos e lentamente me envolvi em um novo mundo, em uma nova maneira de viver. Um ser cheio de felicidade e esperança saiu a reluzir dentro de mim, meu verdadeiro eu foi saindo, por canções como Tri-Angle e fui sendo abrandada por Tonight, tudo era como um sonho, um sonho que não queria que terminasse. O mar vermelho que os representa uma fração disso corre por minhas veias, meu coração já não me pertence, pertence a eles, eles que estão enchendo minha vida de felicidade, eles que tem trabalhado duro para obter sua meta;eu também quero fazer o mesmo. Eu não quero ter medo, eu não quero correr...tenho visto minha vida sem sua música, e odiei cada momento.
Eu estou feliz, ainda que seja , as vezes me sinto triste ou uma dor em meu peito. Mas não mais os escuto rir, cantar, e jogar; tudo desaparece como se nada.Cada vez que fecho meus olhos os posso ver, ninguém ao meu redor pode entender o que eu sinto ao escutar sua música, porque fecho os olhos e escuto a beleza de seu ser, e seu talento.Uma lua pratiada e um rising sun veio a minha vida e tudo voltou a uma beautiful life...porque amanhã vem e eu sei que DBSK também vai a sair o sol e trazer novas esperanças e felicidade na minha vida. Eu não acredito que pudesse voltar a minha vida anterior, agora que meu verdadeiro ser foi descoberto, agora que finalmente posso sentir segurança e força que antes não sabia que estava dentro de mim. Dou graças a Deus todos os dias por por o Dong Bang Shin Ki em meu caminho. Agora, eu preciso tua força mais que nunca, quando todos não estão ao meu redor na noite, um pouco deles ainda esta comigo em sua música, é sua essência. Espero sempre ter isso comigo, gostaria um dia mostrar-lhes quanto eles significam em minha vida, este é o caminho que posso fazer.Eles me ajudam quando me sinto derrotada, quando fiquei doente, me ajudaram com sua música alegre e com a mensagem que dão as fans que, briguemos por nosso lugar no mundo...Meu coração se anela, e eu sempre estarei ai com o resto de Cassiopeia para proteger-los como estão nos protegendo a miséria.

Dong Bang Shin Ki poem poema ESPAÑOL (portuguese in future)

Wed, 16 Apr 2008 23:37:58 GMT

for those who have no idea what is this, I want to do a project a very small one where people who are fans of dbsk write ... this poem I wrote in many languages I just want to see how many languages DBSK fans speak besides english^^ So, far I put English, Spanish and Korean I am getting a friend to work on the portuguese one... if you want to help or read the thing please do ^^

La oscuridad residia en mi corazón y el rencor pecaminoso tomo posesión de mi alma. Hasta la ultima gota de esperanza y felicidad se habia desaparecido para siempre eso era lo que pensaba. De la oscuridad vino la luz y esa luz me trajo esos sentimientos escondidos que yo habia colocado y guardado lejos de mi ser.

Buscando por todos lados para a ver si podia encontrarme a mi misma trate pero no pude, pero despues Dios me mando 5 cantantes coreanos y lentamente me envolvi en un nuevo mundo en una nueva manera de vivir. Un ser lleno de felicidad y esperanza salio a relucir dentro de mi, mi verdadero ser fue saliendo a causa de canciónes como Tri-Angle y fui siendo ablandada por Tonight, todo era como un sueño, un sueño que no queria que terminara. El mar rojo que los representa una fracción de eso de eso corre por mis venas, mi corazón ya no me pertenece le pertenece a ellos, ellos que han llenado mi vida de felicidad, ellos quienes han trabajado tan duro para obtener su meta; yo tambien quiero hacer lo mismo. Yo no quiero tener miedo, yo no quiero correr...he visto mi vida sin su musica, y odie cada momento. Yo estoy feliz aunque sea que a veces me siento triste o un dolor en mi pecho pero nada mas los escucho reír, cantar, y jugar; todo se desaparece como si nada. Cada vez que cierro los ojos los puedo ver, nadien alrededor mio puede entender lo que siento al escuchar su musica, por que cierro los ojos y escucho la belleza de su ser, y su talento. Una luna platiada y un rising sun vino a mi vida, y volvio todo a un beautiful life...porque mañana viene yo se que DBSK tambien va a salir con el sol y traer nuevas esperanzas y felicidad a mi vida. Yo no creo que pudiera regresar a mi vida anterior ahora que mi verdadero ser hacido descubierto, ahora que finalmente puedo sentir seguridad y fuerza que antes no sabía que estaba dentro de mi. Le doy gracias a Dios todos los días por poner a Dong Bang Shin Ki en mi camino. Ahora yo necesito su fuerza mas que nunca, cuando todos no estan alrededor mio en la noche, un poco de ellos todavia esta conmigo en su musica, es su esencía. Espero siempre tener eso conmigo, quisiera un dia enseñarles cuanto ellos significan en mi vida, esto es lo minimo que puedo hacer. Ellos me han ayudado cuando me siento derotada, cuando me enferme ellos me ayudaron con su musica alegre y con el mensaje que nos dan a las fans que peliemos por nuestro sitio en el mundo...Mi corazón los anhela, y yo siempre estare ahi con el resto de Cassiopeia para protegerlos como ellos nos han protegido de la miseria

Dong Bang Shin Ki poem

Wed, 16 Apr 2008 20:01:23 GMT

Darkness resided in my heart and unholy bitterness took a hold of my soul.
내 마음은 어둠에 가득 찼었고 사악한 냉소가 나의 영혼을 사로 잡았었습니다.

Every last bit of hope and happiness was gone never to come back or so I thought.
마지막 희망과 행복마저 사라졌고 다시는 돌아오지 않을 것이라고 생각했습니다.

From the darkness came the light and that light brought me back all those hidden feelings that I had pilled up and stored somewhere far from myself.
어둠에 사로 잡힌 이후로 빛과 나의 감정들은 내가 모르는 어디엔가에 숨겨졌습니다.

Searching everywhere to see if I could find myself I tried but I failed but then God sent me 5 Korean singers, and slowly I became involved in a new world a new way of life, a happier, hopeful true self came to the light it was brought by songs like Tri-Angle and it was soften by Tonight, everything was such a dream, a dream that I still wish not to wake up from.
전의 나 자신을 찾을 수 없었다고 생각 했을 때 신은 나에게 5명의 한국 가수들을 보내주었고 나는 서서히 새 세상과 새 삶을 찾았습니다. Tri-Angle을 통해 진정한 나를 찾을 수 있었고 Tonight은 마음을 평온하게 해 주었고, 모든 것이 꿈만 같고 이 꿈에서 깨어나고 싶지 않습니다.

The red sea that represents them a fraction of it I feel is running through my veins, my heart beats faster pumping all the redness of my soul.
그들의 색인 붉은 바다가 내 혈관을 흐르고 심장을 통해 붉은 빛이 격렬하게 내 영혼에 퍼지는 것을 느낄 수 있습니다.

My heart does not belong to me any more but to them, they who make my life filled with happiness, they who worked hard to reach their goal; I want to do the same.
내 심장은 더이상 내 것이 아닙니다, 내삶을 행복으로 가득 채워 주고 자신의 목표를 향해 최선을 다하고 있는 그들의 것입니다. 나도 그들을 닮고 싶습니다.

I do not want to be afraid, I do not want to run...I've seen my life without their music, I hated it every moment of it, now I am happy although I may feel sad and a pain in my chest as soon as I hear them laugh,sing and play it all evaporates in thin air.
나는 두렵지 않고 도망치고 싶지도 않습니다..그들의 음악이 없었을 때 나는 내 삶은 괴로웠지만, 이젠 마음이 아파도 그들의 음악을 들으면서 웃을 수 있고, 같이 따라 부르면서 슬픔을 증발 시킬 수 있습니다.

Every time I close my eyes I see them, no one around me can understand what I feel when I hear their music, why I close my eyes and listen to the beauty of their being to their talent.
눈을 감을 때마다 그들을 느끼고, 아무도 내가 그들의 음악을 들을 때의 어떤 기분인지, 왜 내가 그들의 재능이 주는 아름다움을 느낄 때 눈을 감는지 이해하지 못합니다.

A silver moon and a rising sun came to my life, and it turned it into a beautiful life...because tomorow comes I know that DBSK will also rise with the morning and bring new hope and new happiness to my life.
은빛 달과 떠오르는 태양이 내 삶에 찾아왔고, 아름다운 삶으로 변했습니다..왜냐하면 내일이 오면 동방신기도 새 희망과 새 행복과 함께 떠오를 것을 알기 때문입니다.

I do not think I can go back to my previous self now that my true self has been unlocked, now that I finally feel a sense of security and strenght that I did not know I had in me, I thank God every day for putting Dong Bang Shin Ki in my path.
나는 진정한 자신이 숨겨져 있던 과거로 돌아 가지 않을 것입니다, 난 이제 전에 못 느꼈던 내 안에 안정과 활력을 느낄 수 있고, 동방신기를 내 길에 보내 주신 신께 감사합니다.

Right now I need their strength more than ever, when everyone is not around at night, a bit of them is still with me their music, and their essence.
지금 이순간 난 그들의 활력을 어느 때보다 원하고, 모두가 나를 떠난 밤에도 그들의 일부인 음악이 항상 저와 함께 있다는 것을 압니다.

I wish to always keep that with me, I wish to one day show them how much they mean to me, this is the least I can do.
항상 그들과 합께하고 싶습니다. 언젠가 그들이 나에게 얼마나 소중한 존재인지 보여 주고 싶고, 그게 내가 할수 있는 전부인 것 같습니다.

They helped me when I felt down when I was sick because of their cheerful music and always tell us fans to fight for our place in the world...
그들은 내가 우울하거나 아플 때 즐거운 음악을 통해 나를 도와줬고 저희 팬들에게 너희들을 위해 항상 노력하라고 말해 주었습니다.

My heart yearns for them, and I will always be there with the rest of Cassiopeia to protect them as they have protected us from misery.
간절하게 빕니다, 그리고 그들이 나를 불행으로부터 지켜줬듯이 카시오페아와 함께 그들을 지켜 줄겁니다.

TVXQ Fighting!
동방신기 화이팅!

Written by Rainingwendy@ Soompi (xiahnsaya1004@youtube)
Translated to korean by Sangmin ( ypsk1123@skype.com)

2nd Kr ver by Nam Mountain@skype

어두움이 나의 마음을 덮고 음산한 아픔이 나의 영혼을 지배했었다.

난 모든 희망과 행복이 사라지고 다시는 돌아오지 않을 거라고 생각했다. 그 어둠에 빛이 찾아왔고 그 빛은 내 마음 한구석에 남아있던 감춰진 마음을 비추어 줬습니다. 나를 찾을려고 발버둥 치던 나에게 하나님은 5명의 한국인 가수를 보내주었고 저는 천천히 새로운 세상으로 나아갔습니다. 행복, 희망이 트라이 앵글 같은 음악을 통해 스스로 찾아왔습니다. 모든것은 꿈이 듯했습니다. 깨고 싶지 않은 좋은 꿈이요.

붉은 바다 (Red Sea) 는 제 핏줄을 타고 흐르는 과 나의 심장을 뛰게 하는 것 그리고 나의 영혼을 빨갛게 물들이는 것을 니타내기도 합니다.

저의 마음은 더 이상 저의 것이 아니라 저의 삶을 행복으로 가득 채워주었던, 목표를 이루기 위해 열심히 노력하는 그들의 것입니다. 그들에게 보답 하고 싶습니다. 그들의 음악을 모르던 시절에 저의 삶을 싫어했습니다. 하지만 지금은 전 행복합니다. 전 더 이상 두렵지도 도망치지도 않을 것입니다. 그들의 음악을 들으면 모든 슬픔과 고통은 사라집니다.

항상 눈을 감으면 그들을 볼 수 있습니다. 주변의 아무도 저를 이해 하지 못하죠.

은빛달 과 떠오르는 태양이 저를 찾아왔고 저의 삶을 훨씬 아릅답게 비쳐줍니다.

왜냐하면 내일이 오면 또 다시 새로운 행복과 희망을 가지고 저를 찾아오기 때문입니다.

저는 이제 다시 예전으로 돌아가지 못할 것입니다. 저는 이제 참자아를 찾은 듯 합니다.

전 마침내 편안함과 힘 그리고 안정을 느낍니다. 동방신기를 제 삶에 보내주신 것에 대해 감사드립니다.

전 이느낌을 꼭 간직하고 싶으며 언제가 그들이 얼마나 큰 의미를 가졌는지 그들에게 보여주고 싶습니다.

끝까지 싸워이기라고 팬에게 이야기하는 그 들의 꿈을 주는 음악으로 그들은 지치거나 아플 때 나를 도왔습니다..

내 마음은 항상 그들을 동경하고 있습니다 . 그리고 난 모든 카시오페아와 함께 그들이 우리를 지켜주었듯이 그들을 지킬 것 입니다.

JUNSU

Mon, 19 Nov 2007 00:44:12 GMT

My love for junsu goes beyond any love out there! I seriously been busy though trying to get to know more about DBSK and stuff like that I even started a fan fic in spanish.

I am going to post some Junsu and Jae Joong pics

either way got to go ttyl

CRAP I HATE ABOUT ...

Sun, 11 Mar 2007 02:28:32 GMT

Pennsylvania

1. People at least where I live right now they pay 2 seperate bills for gas and electricity! In New Jersey I got both from one company not 2.

2. I hate when they say stuff like "He is so ignorant." When he is being rude not ignorant.

3. There is no public bus system here that takes you to somewhere worth something.

4. Molasses was never good to begin with.

5. All the Asian Food you can get here is microwavable, and all the Mexican Food you can get here is THEIR version of Mexican; which is usually some nasty fake taco shells or Taco Bell.

6. There is no driving school anywhere close to were I live. How about if you do not have anyone with a license where you reside, those that mean that you have no right to learn how to drive.

7. There are corn fields everywhere you go.

8. People think they are all that when they have nothing to presume.

9. They think people in New Jersey drive bad but do not see how their driving skills are lacking skills. Mostly no one reads their manuals anyway and expect to pass.

10. People smoke like there was no tomorrow and some restaurants even allow people to smoke inside!

11. There are more cementaries in this whole state then probably people living in here.

12. You have to get a state acception to do dental work that should be included to begin with your insurance or etc.

13. They make you sign this thing saying that the state will give the children something called a "K" pill just incase the nuclear reactors, or water reactors as they call them explode. I am sorry but I think that is too late. What is this K pill anyway.

14. People love their trucks more then anything

And let me stop there.

The thing that I hate the most about just living here was that being called a "spic" was pretty darn mean. I am sorry but does not mean because my english maybe at parts a bit different then yours or my grammar skills are not that great, that you have to judge me like if I was some flipping insect that just fell out of the sky! Dude, I pay taxes and crap like that and if my grammar is not that well I guess you would say it is because the educational system in some states including Pennsylvania is not going where it is supposed to be! I noticed by living here if your daddy is rich and crap like that they treat you better just because. Where I was born which is not too far from here people don't give a crap if daddy is rich if he was that flipping rich then why in the heck are you in a public school. Even if he were that rich that does not make you better then the other students that people can get away cheating on their stupid tests just because they are not afraid of getting introuble because "Daddy will do something about it"!

Me I am so thankful I was not born in Pennsylvania, God knows I want to leave this stupid state soon, it is not actually the state it is just the hundreds of stupid idiots that I meet that only care about "English is the best language in the world and no one from y'all <name the country and language> better then us. And there is no music that isn't country.

First of all country sounds like someone from the alpes came down and started to pay some banjo with other stuff. I mean there are some mixtures with country with other types of music; that is okay but country alone what is wrong with you people! It is just so much about trucks and dogs and mudd and beer!

something like

One day I went down to the highway ridding my red truck.
I saw a deer at the end of the road.
There was no more beautiful deer then that one not even the one I got home.
I wanted to keep it to myself so I got my riffle and started to hunt.

Oh, there aint nothing but the hunt behind a beautiful red truck.
When the deer is as big as a buck.
I have no idea what I am trying to say but as for me my deer I love you.

or something like that.

The point is that I know I sounded dumb saying that country is all crappy. I listened to some like that song "My Maria" I liked it, although I wanted to get a song from Ricky Martin but it was not that bad for a song.
---
I met my share of stupid kids, one time I was walking with my mum of course talking Spanish and they started to try to make fun of us like if I was Chinese or something. I do not look Chinese one bit even if I do love Chinese food and want to go to China one of these days. Why are kids so stupid, we are the United States we are the melting pot and we do not behave like it having tollerance for languages. I am sorry if English was the language for here it should not be now I mean we should be global. Learn from every language try to do what other countries do by showing our children at a young age that their language is just one of the many thousands in the world and give them a language they should learn besides English. We are going to be doing business in the future with more and more people do you think we should have our kids just know English and look like idiots infront of their friends in Japan and stuff because they show English among other languages in Japan and it is accesable to anyone. No matter if you are in college or university or not. I am thankful that I at least know English and Spanish and I am now learning a bit of Korean I hope I can learn some Japanese in the making too, but I do want to learn some Mandarin very very soon. I try to be friendly to people who want to learn English or Spanish. I tell them that I do not have the best grammar in the world, duh that is why we have that spelling check thing on Microsoft Word. Not all "Americans" know how to do grammar or spell. The point is that we try. I mean I am sorry but towards spelling English is pretty weird because the words do not sound like how you want to write them there could be a million and one ways to write a word and it could mean another one. But that is the charm English has. How you think we got English at one time English was probably a minority language because I doubt the whole world knew English at one time. Things change, how about if we in the future will have more Hispanic People in a few years. I mean the birth rates are up and I am pretty thankful because that keeps the Hispanic Culture as a whole alive here. I doubt the United States would be anything without Hispanics, Asians, African Americans, etc. I doubt we would have flavor in our food without all those cultures, I mean we would be stuck with what hot dogs...!

If the goverment and the people want us to learn better English then why not show it, I mean have mandatory English Classes and give the people help to go to them with transportation and flexible time schedules so that they can work send money to their family and become something in this country.
Where will we be without immigrants huh? Do you think that they do not want to pay taxes? Dude, they want to have benifits they want to be called at least half american! They want to have nice things, they deserve to have nice things. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THEY SUFFERED TO GET HERE? More then what you suffer everytime you want something and your mommy does not get it for you! Some of them die, some of them sell everything they owned in their country to get here. And we take it all for granted, me included.
I am now thankful to live here but we should spread awareness that we are not the only ones in the world, the world does not revolve around America only, it also revolves around Britain, China, Japan, South Korea, North Korea ( yep just because he got weapons hermit kingdom is practically scaring the crap out of people!) and so and so.

Necessity do you know what that word means? I mean come on have you ever ever suffered for something like what am I going to eat next, Will I be robbed next, kidnapped next, rapped, etc. Do you know how it is to see your mum cry because she can't pay the months rent and she knows you have no where else to go. These things are real even in the US. We are not perfect we must change inside we must restructure our people we must change because our mentality is just messed up. We think that everything is perfect here and if the people from illegal countries leave us there will be peace and prosperity. Let me tell you something YOU ARE WRONG! without having them here we would all have to go to pick tomatos and corn our selves! I am sorry but I do not want to do that crap at 4 am in the morning I rather be sleeping in my bed. I feel bad too because I have a bed and there are some kids in the world including the USA because we love to excude ourselves out of everything like if we were the Garden of Eden or something WHICH WE ARE NOT!!!
Have you ever been to Inner Cities or however you people call them, I just call them by what they are the ghetto have you been there? Do you know how it is to live there? Do you know how flipped out you get when you know that today there is going to be a gang fight in so and so street and you have to run home right afterschool because you may end up in the middle of it. Do you know what it is to have a bomb scare every flipping time? Or to have that nasty food that looks like it has been decomposing for about a week? Or to know that in your school there are mice and cockroaches?

DO YOU Know!?

Or do you know how does it feel to have a teacher tell you that she does not care about you because she only cares about her check and people call her crazy because she is teaching in your town only because the check is bigger? Do you know how it is to live more then a year without heath care? Do you know how it is to have someone mistreat you or hurt you just because you were not born in this country and you seem to them as an outsider?

You do not know crap! I bet you that much!

NO ONE IS AN ILLEGAL! I can tell you this. My people have been in this continent wayyyy before the English came and did the 13 Colonies. So if they say oh latinos are illegal and the person saying this is an anglo, they are stupid because their bloodline goes to England, Germany, or whatever country. But we do not say crap about it. No matter if you are from Mexico, Ecuador, Peru, Chile, England, Poland, Korea, Japan, China, Thailand, etc. You are not an illegal at least you should not be because THIS IS A FREE WORLD!!! And it says it is a free country the home of the brave. Don't you think that there are brave people in Mexico, Japan, China, Africa,Korea, or the other countries? We are practically not even a culture because we suck the culture from any country that has ever had people here.

now that is the end of my rant.

Just know that

1 If you want to learn more languages and are not afraid to speak them makes you brave.
2 People should be free and they should have democrasy no matter where in the world they live in.
3 Just because you are not from the country that does not mean that you are a criminal, and you should not be guilty until proven guilty.
4 As long as you can be understood you can speak.
5 People learning a different language and trying to speak it is cute.
6 Teach your kids you native tongue no other language should take that right from your kids, teaching them your language is good plus they will get paid eventually more then those who do not speak it.
7 If you were mad because of stuff I said well that is you problem just know that Country is not the only music out there, if that is your version kudos for you. My version is different and so is everyone elses
8 your nationality should be in your tongue because it carries with it the taste which you were raised to like.
9 I will eat any food out there and you should too but just not insects or stuff that crawls.
10 God Bless you all and I know I am not that good at grammar but I still want to learn more of any other language that is not the one that I half know or whatever the case maybe.!

WE GOT NOT HEAT AGAIN!

Mon, 05 Mar 2007 17:25:52 GMT

Pabo!! We got no heat again and well did i tell you I got my drivers permit and now I am talking to this Russian guy he seems nice and he wants to move to the USA. I also was talking to this chinese dude and he seems nice I seen him in cam and stuff he cute! I talked to the Russo dude a bunch of times he seems to be really nice and stuff to me and I make him laugh!

Spirit in my dream!

Mon, 05 Mar 2007 17:23:40 GMT

Okay mum says its perfectly normal that I had this spirit type child in my dream that looked exactly like my brother come in my dream. I was like dreaming and then apparently I was sleepy in my dream so I felt like I was drifting away, I hope it was not anything bad the part that I was falling asleep in my dream and then like this kid that was my brother apparently suddently apparared and started to bug me. Maybe it was good that he woke me up since I was falling asleep in my dream maybe he saved me from something who knows. The point is that he got me mad. He started to jump around and stuff and then he started to push me and he flipping squeezed something that is not cool! The point is that I started to tell it to go away in my dream in the name of Jesus Christ the thing stopped bugging me after I told it that I was going to tell my mother, I bit his hand. I really thought he was acting like something that was not my brother because my brother would not do that the odd thing is he looked like my brother. So I grabbed him by his 2 wrists * in my dream* and well he was bleeding I think because I clearly saw when I took something off his left wrist it was an ugly thing anyway, when I was walking down the stairs he looked at me with his nasty eyes they looked all white then I really noticed it was not my brother so I started to scream for my mum in spanish and korean. She didnt listen to me so I started yelling in korean and she came up. I was already awake by then I think but I clearly felt the pain in my chest since that thing kept pushing me in my dream and then what he ended up doing in the end I still felt it. My mum told me that it was the little "angelito" * angel* that was trying to play with me. Flipping heck the last thing you want to do to me if you are one of them is to bug me in my sleep! I love my sleep anyone that bugs me is going to get a beating in my dreams. She was like I told you last time that he came and visited me. Dude, I thought that angelito came but in like a vision or some weird crap like that not in dreams...actually I think it was a half dream. my mum says its entre sueños something around the interlude or between dreams and crap. I mean if that thing comes and bugs me again its going down. My mum says that he wants love and stuff. no way is LOVE in what he did to me! Trying to pretend to be my brother! I mean seriously if he wanted love why not show itself like it is unless its seriously ugly then I dont want to see it thanks. Why pretend to be my brother. I guess it thought I would not do anything to it if it were my brother and that is true because I went easy on him. I mean if someone sweezed your boobs in dream or not in dream would you let them heck no!
I mean I know it sounds odd but why he be doing that! My mum says she saw him come in her dream too the day before and my other aunt saw him last like almost half a year ago. She said he came as my brother and wanted to sleep by her side so she left it... dude the point is that no one bugs me in my dreams!@!!

So I am trying to figure out one he is a spirit of someone who passed away around here and I want him to go to the spirit world were he belongs so he will wait for the second comming or he is a bad dude which I hope he is not because that will be not good. Either way how do I know that he is not a part of my imagination and a part of the imagination of everyone that came here.

What is the difference between a ghost and a spirit.

How can I find out what he wants?

and why he touch my boobs?

DAH BAH!

Thu, 15 Feb 2007 02:34:49 GMT

I do not like V day that much!! I call it Inuyasha Day and today I did not thing I got my heat back on I am soo bored so I wont talk that much! I ll write more later

NAGGING IS IT A SPORT OR WHAT!

Sat, 10 Feb 2007 17:48:45 GMT

Seriously, my mum does it all the time no kidding! I mean as soon as I wake up I hear it even in my sleeep I hear it I think I am going nuts

more on my crap later

Baka!!!!!!

I have no heat it sucks!

These freaking gringos suck butt when it comes to working! I know if I was back in my hometown some dude would have come fast to fix the crap of my heater furnace what ever the heck the thing is called!!!!

Stupid people here apparently hate to work! and that Neightbor of mine not getting his truck here before it's to late and I cant bring home that organ!!! AHHHHHH

WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS!!! That is it! I hate it here ! It is cold and the stupid heaters do not work they have shortage of air circulation what the heck is it the flipping human body!!! ????

And then the people going to instal the Dish come and they are going to instal what they want and that is it WTFlip! I mean come on! I WANT MY STUPID CHANNELS although I do not need ABC because I can see ugly betty online but now I know I can get KBS World here, I mean I am not Korean or anything I am a Mexican American only American because I was born here, I love the US no doubt about that but we got some flipping crazy red necks up in here, that I bet they never been once around their backyards. Seriously! Them people up in here do not even own a passport or know what the heck it looks like. I just found out that credit cards are a form of ID wtFlip! I mean where in the heck do you see a picture of a person in those plastic debt cards!?

I tried getting a bank account yesterday* doesn't it sound like I do a lot of things even if I do not have a job!? I mean come for someone not to do nothing and have a lot to say that is something right there, I do not work because I have a mother that says. " I did not cross the Río Grande to have my only Daughter work for minimum wage! I will not let you work until you have a carrer!" All that in Spanish which sounds a bit like this. "Yo no vine a este pais de tan lejos cruzando el Río Grande para que mi única hija trabaje en un factoría para que solo gane lo minimo, que te cres!?"

Something like that well its flipping cold I am freezing my butt of and I have nothing else to do...if you want to email me to tell me something that I should up in my blog thing checktheswitch@yahoo.com is my email

I BEEN ROBBED SOMEONE CALL THE COPS!

Sat, 10 Feb 2007 07:16:14 GMT

That is what I say dang it! But the stupid flipping stupidos don't do crap! They suck! Seriously, I would rather go around every backward in my stupid wannabe town since even my hometowns police is better then the stupid pendejos that are called cops here. Cops my butt! They only have like what 3 flipping police cars and what one of them is around the high school, and the rest of them is not enough for the red necks that live here. I bet you some stupid idiota took my stupid stuff and now is selling it in some stupid red neck market!!! And they say we hispanics ( mainly mexicans) do crap that isn't legal and crap! They don't live in this stupid part of the country to see that them anglo pendejos do worse crap! I am not kidding I heard about this guy that did his dog back in high school and he was proud about it! WHAT THE HECK IS THAT SERIOUSLY!@!!!! A DOG THEY SHOULD GO TO JAIL FOR THAT ! But apparently that is not that odd around these parts, talk about not getting laid!

Not that not getting laid is bad no man seriously dont get laid till marriage and after you are married make love not sex okay!

But I been robbed and what the cops do NOTHING NADA if I knew how to say that in korean or japanese I would but no kidding seriously stupid baka! So, the cop took my details and crap and looked like he was doing his job * this was on the stupid phone btw* and then when I told him that my mum was making the denuncia and she did not speak English the stupid idiot got all different and crap! What the heck do we Mexican people have like coodies or something that a 3rd grade kid would get away from. My mum may be a bit of a hazzle since she always nags I wonder do Asian older woman nag as much as all my Mexican family or do my family have them won on the whole nagging game! I mean my mum makes me pass a time of hell every time something goes wrong...AUTOMATICALLY ITS MY FAULT!
What the heck seriously oh yah its my fault that crap got stolen 150 bucks of crap she happpend to have in her back yard! THe worse thing is that there is no leads I thought them people here were super nosy, mainly the reason we moved here. But when they steal stuff from latinos no one sees crap but if they steal stuff from a white folk half of the country saw it. WHAT THE HECK IS THAT!

HOpefully who ever stole the thing would bring it back to my house before my mum sends el 41 to them cops here. You know what is worse ! They do not have Hispanic Channels here and I have to have local channels and the funny thing is that, NBC and ABC or something like that do not have their own channels they share them with WNEP and they have only a certain number of radio stations in here and they all SUCK! Playing music that is soo out of style that is crap!

And food here sucks all italian stuff i can barely find stuff to do my tacos with

people suck!

NO HE DIDNT JUST SAY WET BACKS!

Mon, 05 Feb 2007 13:55:59 GMT

Okay, I was listing to the radio, I live in Columbia county aka anglo county, not many hispanic people around here right. Well, I am Hispanic and I am MEXICAN AMERICAN!
My mum was the term called "wet back" and guess what I am proud of being MEXICAN AMERICAN! MR. Voice of Columbia County WHLM BLOOMSBURG you suck! The funny thing is that I wanted to turn off the alarm clock right and I wanted to go to sleep a bit later then usual since I have not been sleeping just because I was watching some Korean movies, I love my culture sure but I also love the Korean Culture and the Asian Culture as a whole South Asian and East Asian alike.

Well, this dude the one who is the "Voice of Columbia Country" you are not my voice! I am proud that people come from Mexico and cross the Bravo you know why? BAKA!? Because they go to the fields early in the morning and in the flipping hotness to pick up vegetables! Would you MR. Voice of Columbia county want to wake up at 4 am I am not sure if you do now or not since you work in the morning, and be paid medium wage for something that is hard to do? I mean I went one time with my aunt back in Mexico. YES, I DO GO TO MEXICO! And we went (actually she dragged me ) to the fields and cosechar
( I bet you do not know Spanish, since you speak so illy about Hispanics.)

I also think you may also feel that just because English is becoming a universal business that makes you better then "a large population" for your information English is the 3rd most popular world language. Out of 6.5 billion people or so about 340 million can speak it natively, and Spanish is spoken by 350 million Natively, also remember that many people that speak Spanish also speak English and those people are called HISPANICS, LATINOS! People who have feelings it doesn't mean because we "apparently sing to black people music" that we are stupid or ignorant. For your imformation many "Anglo" "Whites" also listen to "Black people" music. That is where the term "Wigger" and there is also "Wapanese" I do not think there are the terms "Higger" or "Hapanese" but just to say do not make fun of my people!

Hispanic includes people from every Spanish speaking country, and does that include Spanish people in what you said about the music?

But that is the least of my worries, you said the "Wet Backs" are coming in the country, and they do not settle in San Diego because they want to get as far from the bourder because it will cost more to send them back and blah blah blah more crap came out.

First, let me tell you as what I began with I do not think you want to go to some fields or get paid what they do! They work in conditions a regular "American" does not work in you know why it is because they want to make a better life for their children, another thing if you do have children and you would be in a country that does not have the enough resorces to give your children the life you would want them to have wouldn't you want to leave your country too? Some of the people that come here and are also called "Wet backs" are not only Mexicans so do not generalize please! You are ignorant about what these people have to go through. Some of them could be running away from people trying to murder them just because they have family over here.

And you do not know how much things they have to do to live here. Where would the country be with out us Hispanics first of all it would not have flavour you know why because we make very very good food and even Anglo people can testify to that. Where would American food be without us, it would just be a bunch of Hot Dogs, Hamburgers, and Pizza ( which is borrowed from Italy) And shoe fly pies (ugh!)

As you can notice I was not born to Pennsylvania, and tell you what I am kind of thankful I was not because I would have grown up to be a very boring person. Besides the point Columbia country does have a bit better weather then some places because so far it has not been so bad, but New Jersey also has good weather too, although Pennsylvania is wayyy less poluted. I noticed that a lot of the people here are really ignorant and rude, which ignorant and rude do not mean the samething. I met many people who thought I spoke Chinese, I am sorry but I in no way look Chinese. I am a Mexican born in America, but I do not have the "stereotypical" Mexican complexion. And well I know one thing Hispanics gave you that you did not have "Ugly Betty" Yo soy Betty la Fea, you can't deny it is good.

And most of the people are now looking at Hispanic woman as beauties.

So, don't you say that "wet backs" bring nothing good here, or that they are a problem. If they would be given an amnesty or something like that we would not have "that problem". I am proud my people are hard working to try to change their living conditions to come over here and better theirselves. If you are going to use the whole issue the they do not learn English, first of all if you are not used to hearing English in some ranch in the middle of no where how in the heck are you going to learn it. I been to schools in the ranch my family is from, and do I like that ranch to be honest no, but I am proud my family comes from humble roots so that I know not to take things here for granted. I am thankful my mum came here although she was going to become a lawyer in Mexico but she chose to come here, I had to learn English by myself when I was a child by trying to listen to everything and watch things on tv. At first I thought English was dumb then I thought it was the greatest thing invented and now I think it's just another communication tool. I love Spanish, it is so romantic you can do so many things with it and I love other languages as well like Korean, Japanese, Chinese, and Hindi. I know a few words in Korean and Japanese and I am trying to better myself I know if I would be in Mexico I would not have the opportunity to know English which would make it easier to talk to Asians ( South and East) since they learn English. But who knows maybe if my mum still would have stayed in Mexico I would have turned into one of those fresa kids.

The point is that you probably have not seen many Hispanic people you can probably count them your hands.

To make it short tu eres un idiota!

You are not better then anyone, what is the huge deal about being white anyway besides you are the mayority here? Without us I bet you would not have culture, since resent history has to do with us.

Just know that in a few years you may be speaking Spanish! And do not dear announce Mexican food after you bash us down!
That will be the 1st and last time I hear your radio station, I rather hear songs in Spanish, Korean, and Japanese anyway!

THOSE HISPANICS!! What is wrong with you! BAKA!

신드롬(syndrome)스틸컷 Sim deu rum seu til kes ? my korean isnt that good at all

Sun, 04 Feb 2007 04:33:24 GMT

I cant notice the letters online its hard for me to notice the convenations but what the heck is syndrome I love the G-Soul song called Girl or conduct or what ever it is

after hours before going to sleep looking for it i found it in korean! i had to translate it with world lingo and here are the lyrics!

품행송 by.g-soul

Girl, 네가 원하던 그런 모습으로
변할 순 없는 걸까

Oh~ Girl, 왜 이렇게 난 바보 같은 지
난 변하지 못 하는 걸까

one, two, three, four step
너를 향해 step by step 이제부턴 달라질 꺼야
나를 지켜봐 내 약속을 promise you 너를 향해 달려 갈 꺼야

오늘부터 내일까지 이렇게 다시 내일부터 모레까지 이렇게 자랑스런 남자로 다시 태어 날께 so I can help saying I love you

Oh~ Girl, 많은 사람들 날 믿지 못해도 너만은 내 편이기
Girl, I know you can do 나 변해가는 이유 I just want a make feel you

one, two, three, four step 너를 향해 step by step 이제부턴 달라질 꺼야
나를 지켜봐 내 약속을 promise you 너를 향해 달려 갈 꺼야 ..

i do not know when or how but I am going to Marry Bi (Rain)

Tue, 16 Jan 2007 04:39:05 GMT

i really do not know how or when or will this happen but i will totally do it if i have the chance i mean the guy is just brilliant in every way shape or form and he is soo humble its just awesome!

i mean why do I want to marry him...well I still do not know that much about him and I do not understand one word of korean or when he sings unless I go look for the translations or its in english subs but I just think the guy is ace, I mean you do not have to know sooo much about the dude to want to idk know more about the guy! I mean 1st of all he has pass though a lot in his life and he still is humble that right there is note worthy! I mean his mum passed away when he was young and they didnt talk and stuff, before his debuit (sp?) he was told he was ugly and his face was ugly, just because he didnt have double eye lids and he also didnt eat for like 4 days because he didnt have money for food...that right there is a man in the making, i mean to take that crap and still keep going on with your dream is something. I do hope that he does well in the USA I know that he has had some concerts here but I will totally try to make it to one of his concerts some time in the future and hopefully get all his cds. I mean the guy is ace, he can dance, sing and act! And he is flipping cool on commercials! I wanna marry this dude hehe!

I mean I would first have to know him and stuff and well by the time in the future hopefully I grew up myself although I am kind of younger then he is by a few years but we were born on the same month!!!! He on june 25 me on June 15...yah I am a fangirl! I mean i wouldnt glomp him or nothing probably just want his autograph and his hand in marriage but yah....i am getting to ahead of myself but i havent slept much these days because I been watching his dramas~!!!!! and been dreaming with him...well he sleeps less then me like what 4 hrs or so...flipping heck!

if you do not believe me or know who he is i will put a few links here and you will love this guy I am serious!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5S5RMi_Q0y0

the last one is a prank they did on him

Wonderul night of my life!!

Sun, 07 Jan 2007 03:03:33 GMT

Wonderful!!!! Just wonderful!!!! Que divino!!

Okay, I know it wont be that nice tomorrow when I will not be able to see him for a very very very long time since he lives in Utah, but Or he was soo wonderful today, it was just awesome how fate worked that I ended up kata with kata with him...Shoulder okay...

Yah he sat next to me I thought I was going to sit next to Jay but no it was Or, or wonderful Or I always wanted my Or ever since Habibi..I finally think I got him.

He ate a lot which is good yet he doesnt look like he does he is soo cute! Kawaii!!!

his eyes and all wow!!!

well we talked we laughed we laughed some more yet in the beginning it was odd since it was quiet before i used to get nervous in quietness not no more..this time it was him...and well I grew from most of my fears before he came and he helped me get over one...the clown one anywho...the thing is that...i got burned...just like the time I first had him over my house..I got a burnt mark on my stomach...but this time I got burned but not as bad in my hand he was like its hot..In my mind I was like not as hot as you...
it was just wonderful to see him in his blue snow tie...when we first got there they were in the car...and I knew it was him I shock his hand a few times...yah he is wonderful.

in the dinner was i said we talked he was good to joke around with just wonderful. he has an appetite that I didnt feel shy about eatting around him and the whole family thing I never felt that close in dinner time to him it was just too good to be true...you just had to be there to feel what I felt...I am really likeing this guy and I did get a bit jelous when I found out that Sandra* is thinking about him as the 2nd dude..just in case everything with J&J Shampoo* doesnt go right...I mean Or isnt that type of guy!

Cant she understand how special he is...I mean while we were eating he was talking to my mum and myself about stuff and we were just kidding around talking about my brother going to be bathroom and getting the guy out of there...i laughed like I have not laughed in such a long time..and he looked at me...those eyes. AWWWW!!!

He wanted to help pay for dinner mum said it was his Good bye present but what i learned from KANK is NEVER SAY GOOD BYE!!!

I will not say good bye to him... but see you later...when we exchanging them fortunes me and my brother my hands and his criscrossed because he was exchanging fortunes with my mum..my hand rested slightly on his.. AWWWW TAN DIVINO!!

a few time this happened. then from there...in the end we were saying see you later...;he took my hand and shook it then he wanted to do that weird saludo de onda and it didnt work then after a few tryes we got it it was ace!!

he is something! i took my jacket and then he was like let me hold that I was like okay now give me he was like no...he then held it up and helped me put it on and then from there left...and he took my breath away as he did...

if you just met him you wouldnt expect that but he is such a gentleman he invited us to his house mum wants him to come back she likes him....for me..tell you what...I think this maybe my friend charming...

japanese videos...it got nothing to do with Death Note but it does with Japan!

Sat, 06 Jan 2007 06:46:08 GMT

Some dude I saw his vid because this other dude Minwoo imitated him and I thought it was cool so I looked up Bi and I found this ace song!!! If you get lost in the song remember its japanese not spanish even if it does have a spanish beat.

Repite conmigo es japones...y no se ve minwoo como si fuera guapo pero lo es.

I CANT BELIEVE IT!!!

Wed, 27 Dec 2006 02:52:22 GMT

Seriously, how did things just go this way...dang praying to God does result, I seriously do not know how is it possible that I have such good luck! Okay, today I woke up really late like at 6 pm and stuff and was eatting mole ( not mole you person but mole the mexican food, you know the sause and the meat and the torillas ya know) okay so the point is that I was having a good dinner then watching la fea mas bella too, and it was just horrible to see Fernando so sad and stuff I just wanted to hug him and I was thinking dude it would be ace if I had a guy in my life and stuff, yesterday I wrote that I wanted a guy who would be a bit taller then me but not that that tall that I wouldnt be able to breathe if he was holding me and stuff, and I was thinking about the hug Or gave me and it was just ace the way he just told me that he is like family...dont know what kind but I guess its all good if he just hugged me a bit right. So everything went okay in Christmas Day the Elders came and stuff and well stupid me tried to get Or out of his jacket after the hug since he said himself that he smelled like cigarrests from S family who happends to be that guy lets call him Joshi o something like that to that point, well they smoke so that was stupid of me to try to get him out of the jacket but also he put his tie by my ear since it sings "silent night" yah "noche de paz" was what I had idk i forgot

the point is that John called and he wanted me to translate for this dude and well it caught me off guard for him to call from WA to PA since its like far away and well he also sent me an email but it was cool to have him call I am soo praying some more God always listens...i never knew I would have 2 cute guys being my friends...

i deny the blasphemy challenge

Wed, 20 Dec 2006 16:04:34 GMT

if you deny of the blasphemy challenge too and love the spirit of God and God and Jesus post your video on my youtube and stuff...

if you do not know what the blasphemy challenge is it is this dude who is telling people to do the unforgibable sin of denying the holy spirit...which in mark it says its bad...and unforgibably please do not let this guy fool you into doing it for a stupid free dvd...your soul is worth more then that!

http://www.myspace.com/thegodheadchallenge

you can post your videos there on in my youtube, those who want to join me in saying they love God they do not have to be LDS at all just love God and Jesus and stuff...if you love God and you want to do a video about that stating your religion thats cool too

Bollywood

Thu, 14 Dec 2006 00:09:31 GMT

Type your cut contents here.

I so love it seriously!! Veer-Zaara, Devdas, Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, Salaam Nameste, or something like that....I wish I could see all the Bollywood movies seriously!@!! Shah Rukh Khan is a great actor and Kajol, Aishwarya, and Rani are great actresses and stuff....!

the world smells like sweet honey

Thu, 07 Dec 2006 00:28:54 GMT

okay...not the world exactly but Elder Or smells like that...I know he gave me his jacket to hold and stuff and his tie too...Elder Or and Elder Jay were helping us move a few things downstairs...and well, Elder Or and me were in the living room....alone...the rest of the people were in the next room over playing a game. Elder Or was watching this tv thing...I came in I just wanted to pull his nose but I did not...that would have been ackward but he wincked at me again. What the heck is it with him and his winking game?

Well, in the end he was like just look at this i put my head to look at what it was then my hand side the machine his hand and mine met many times...and then he came to put the nut inside and stuff and his hair was on my face and I could sooo smell him wayyyyyy more then I have before...Elder Jay cleared his thought I think he saw my relection the time Elder Or gave me his stuff smelling it...yah...because I didnt let go of his things even if there was hooks to hang it on....and finally I gave a hand shake and they left... my arm smelled like his sent.

okay I was watching Veer-Zaara, which been wanthing to watch for months and stuff...dude SRK is hot...he is 41 and he is still hot...I cant spell his name right Shah Rukh Kahan something like that I am not sure but they call him King Khan, he really is talented, even has a female inpersonator dang that girl is really something...she was looking for him in london...I would really be scared to look for my idol and stuff...last time I went to look for John Mayer I was really embarrased and the people who were in charge of his concert were really rude...they shattered my dreams..well kudos for her being brave that way.

Charly

Mon, 04 Dec 2006 07:45:28 GMT



"Charly" on Google Video
Charly. Comedia Romantica Mormona. (Las Familias son eternas) Iglesia de Jesucristo de los santos de los ultimos dias libro de mormon mormons mormones sud jose smith joseph book of bible biblia lds latter day saints

Rebelde

Tue, 28 Nov 2006 03:27:16 GMT

I found out, finally listing to that song what it actually means to me.
Well, today the Elders came and well it was kind of odd, I was seeing La Fea Mas Bella and they knocked I couldnt finish seeing it...all I know is that Lety saw Marcia in her weding dress. One thing, when I get married, if
I do I want the whole world to know!!

So yah, what I really found out is that, I couldnt keep my eyes away from Elder Or.* Seriously, he there is something about him that really keeps me like wanting to stare at me, and he did wink at me, it was probably because I kept staring at him wayyy to much. Is it my fault that everything keeps pointing to him? I mean everything, the way that he is going to die here in a few months and the thing that something keeps telling me that I should change. The way he stared at me yesterday, the way that he likes or looks for the way to touch my hand. Then again, he says he will not get married, but why does he always say it, when I am infront of him. Why everything he usually says when I am there by ear distance. Like there was a conversation that happend not to long ago Mr Anonymus* was talking with Michel* and Elder Or* took Michel's* keys he was like there is a voodo doll here ( it was a small rabit) Mr. Anonymus* was like check what it says on the ticket, I checked and so did Elder Or.*, Mr. Anonymus was like it says OR. M Ekley* ( not his real name but it should be Elder Or, full name). Elder Or. was like thats really slick and me stupidly I was looking for it and then started to laugh. Then Mr. Anonymus he was like, you see even though he is like that half of the time, I wouldnt change him for anything, because when he talks with the spirit you know. I was like yah he stops murmuring and you can actually understand him. The look that Elder Or. gave priceless, not as priceless as spending a night with Jaime Camil, but priceless as the feeling it gives me just remembering. Those are like 2 ends of the spectrum, what I wish would happen and I know will never and what I think may happen.

okay, i just had to dance a bit. Right now I am listing to Miss Murder which is my friends fav song, he got me into it before he went to jail, his name is Rich* haha of course I cant tell you his name. But just know that he is a wonderful person and hopefully when he gets out of the jam he will be as cool as ever, and older too, wiser.

Well, as I was saying, Elder Or. started to talk to Sister Myphis* husband, that dude was talking about that maybe in a few Elder Or. would get married and talking to him. Elder Or. wants someone who hunts and fishes...but when you marry someone you love them, and their faults...Why would you want someone who likes half of the stuff you like, there for you will not have time alone with your friends, hello!?

I know that I love shopping, I do not think I want a husband that totally adores shopping but will do it with me once and a while as I will try their guy stuff. I do not like football but if he does, I will tell him to show me, the rules and how to play. And hopefully he loves soccer because that is what I want my kids to learn.

I really do not know what path to take

well the point is, that my cousin read my fortune and said that I will have something to do with an italian guy...although he said dark hair then he said he had something to do with dogs and stuff or maybe owned them. Well, I really do not know but I trust his judgement more then mine at the moment.

Then well this sunday, I really went over board. You know how Roberta has her eyes in Rebelde well I did that, I highlighed my eyes in black and the top a bit of blue, gosh my eyes looked so cool. They looked biger then they usually do, I wore pink, pink shirt and skirt, ones that Missy gave me. Missy* she is soo cool! I do hope eventually she will get married if not if the dude I marry has an older bro, I am soo hooking them up!

Well, I looked my best, people keep telling me that there is something I need to change and I found out exactly what it is. I need to clean out a few things from my closet and it aint my tarot cards. It is my dependency to something else and my laziness. I am going to try to lose that and lose weight how ever in the world I can.

Well, I know Elder Or. he said he wanted someone cute oh well, the point is that I want to do this for me.

As I was saying..Elder Or. told Sandra something I forgot...but the point is that Sandra, told me that Elder
Or. told her that Elder Jay was getting transfered...and well Elder Jay left his name tag, so I took it to church. And I tried to bribe him, he wanted it he was not about to give me my gospel principles book but, he did.

HEHE he cant be bad I mean he is an elder!

so yah. Then well, I hopefully will get RBD cd Celestial! The point is that, Elder Or. was just cute when he came to my house and I told my mum it was his idea as well. My mum likes Elder Or. at the begining none of us liked him and now it ends up being that I have a crush on him. I think Elder Jay knows at least after tonight the way that I looked at Elder Or. and my mind was out of place....it was sooo obvious and Elder Or. stared into my eyes yesterday...and told me I look good in pink.

i m going to do a reading to see what comes out.

What to do about me?

Sun, 26 Nov 2006 03:21:23 GMT

Okay, family I love it very dearly I do, but it can be one pain in the arse...I mean everytime Gwen do this Gwen do that, flipping heck modern day Cinderella with a swist...she was skinny, I am not... Every time I am noticing that I have lack of energy this and that...i cant move as I used to and yet I am young I am 19 and I feel every day like I was in my death bed...I must do something about it, I really must, I mean I just feel half the time I really do not belong here...at times I wish I could have a lipo or something like that but then again I would probably gain weight again since I love food...I promised my self I would lose weight last year and I gained like 34 pounds...I feel horrible I never been so big in my life, I am 240 pounds when I was not that big before....I started to gain weight like crazy after some thing happpend then, that was my dark ages...which was last year...then it was this year around my birthday, I gained more weight from then to here...like nuts...this year my b day was not that great....you know at times I wish I could turn back time...go back to being 15 again, man I wasnt that fat back then and nevermind how about when I was not born....kind of I mean those werent happy moments and stuff either...I mean at least not for me mum...but hopefully I would have learned how to control my eating habits...oh I just cant stop eating I hate it, then well now I am stuck with this clean this do that...just because I do not study...right now what I wish I had was or would be to ....dang I actually stopped dreaming! I hate being an adult, I hate it ! I wish I was a child once again innocent and small...and then maybe take life and reshape it so that something better could come out of me...because I really do hate my life as I have it now...I mean I am happy I could do things and stuff...but I just do not have the drive or the anbition to make a name for myself like to just bring value to me...I love to write that is for sure, but not even that I could do well, my grammar skills stick, and thanks to New Jersey's education, I can't did not learn anything, impart I also had to do things myself always. English homework, so on and so forth, I wonder how was it that I got throught. If I could right now I would love to make dresses and design them or do something with writing...I do not want to be a teacher or mainly go to college to be exact, I tried that path, I hate it...its all gloomy and alone. I didnt have friends or anything.

my only friend was my teacher, and my so called friend...now I got nothing...besides my mum whining and watching La Fea Mas Bella online and seeing Jaime Camil on tv and online, I got nothing but shattered dreams and hopes and no will to do much but whine and I wish I could do something about it, I really do, I mean right now I know I have to learn how to drive, but its easier said then done...that book is soo boring and this and that, it would be easier if the car could drive it self or something. I mean for what I know in Mexico you could buy your lisence I like that aprouch on things..

I also know I have to loose the weight or I will end up more alone then anyone...what will happen if my mum would not be here...i ll slowly roate away here...fade away unto nothing...the nothing that....that would be painful for me very painful...i do not want to be nothing or part of the stetistics but I do not have any talents...maybe God forgot about me and did not give me anything to use to be better...I mean I do have a bit of a psychic talent but people usually say that is damned...by the bible none the less. I know some dude told my mum that I had a talent, which is what....? I cant find anything everything i would be good at, wont get me to have a career or be successful, if I tell my mum I really do not want to be in college she will flip...what else is there to do...if i had a nice body...i would be an actress since I do over react and mostly anything could make me cry...but....a body...like the ones on magazines that I lack...

talent...i kind of lack there too

inteligence...i m okay there mainly idk what kind of intelegince I have but it isnt for numbers or anything...some people tell me my family blood is stupid well that is kind of true...maybe we are more nature then nurture...

Tarot deck here I come

Thu, 23 Nov 2006 04:49:49 GMT

Okay, lately well, today I woke up to Gwen there is the celtion deck thing here...(but its actually Celtic dragon deck...but my brother doesnt know the difference)my brother Lion came yelling yesterday, I was wondering if it was going to come, since I want to work on my psychic abilities...btw, I do have some, and well they been kept in a heart shaped box for a while, I know that I could get in trouble for the things that I write in this journal but I am willing to take that chance... since I got it I been reading it and reading it...first the book and well I found out that good things are coming my way...yet I have to be careful and rest...

the doctor called, I have elevated levels in my kidney or was it liver...and my thirod is high too...oh wow...i may end up dying sooner then I expected...let it not be before LFMB finishes or before I met Jaime Camil...how about till I marry him ?? HAHA wishful thinking.

I do not need to be psychic or a witch to know that is never going to happen.

You know I used to practice Wicca and well I gave it up, yet I keep going back to it.

I do not know...why...maybe bc I do not want anything to do with responcibilities and it comes easier....ugh that isnt true...Wicca is hard...very very very very heard...you have to remember things its not I THINK...its I know...and well also the creation it takes a lot of things to believe in that...because it just sounds so far featched for anyone who was raiced christian.

you have to really be sure you want to walk that path since you also will be pointed at...same as the path I am walking in right now...people just point at you tease you and even try to kill you for doing what you believe...

I am at both ends of the stick...LDS and Wiccan in one...unfortunately...I know that God *christian* is very jelous...and only wants to be the only God...and I know Wiccans believe in more then one...usually the Female Deity is the top one...but there are also male ones which usually are seemed as protectors type of people. Yet both believe in a male part and a female part...and that the female is sacred...LDS keeps knows there is a heavenly mum but since there is not much revelation on her because in my opinion God does not want people ill mouthing her...because this will hurt him so he rather keep her secret since people do not believe in him why should they believe in her so he doesnt want to risk it. For what I know about women...because I am one..someone says something about you...you get hurt and then you get even...so...that is a bad thing...either way getting a God mad is bad.

So, it kind of gets me weird on where should I go what should I do...lately I had this elder tag in my computer desk and I look at it and wonder...he actually knows where he is at...for himself to him that is soo true...and for me it is too but to a point...I mean I believe in God Jesus and the Holy Ghost, I also believe in Joseph Smith...but when it comes to divination, its not seemed well there...and Wicca welcomes divination.

I cant help at times to feel a bit inclined to Wicca but I tried it once...didnt have anyone to help me out I was alone and one thing I hate is being alone...so someone found me and offered me to be with people...so I took the chance...I was taught things I already knew but in a different point of view...I was taught to pray...which before I had done spells which is the wiccan form of prayer...just with physical things...there is not difference...although to many the pentragram is evil not to me...I have one just do not even use it because of wrong interpetrations...my mum knows something is up...I really do not know why...I am going back...maybe I am in the half right place...maybe I believe in both...maybe I am meant for both..

but that is like saying that I love two men and I want to marry both...

I made a spread I do not know if it will work I call it La Fea Mas Bella Spread( Tirada)

okay here it goes
------3--------6------
--8---10------2----12

--4----11-----1----9-7

--------------- 5

1) Leticia Padilla Solis (Lety)- Your state of mind

2) Fernando Mendiola- your lover's state of mind

3) Marcia Villaroel- What is keeping your lover from moving on.

4) Conceptos- obsticles

5) Aldo Domensaín- your 2nd choice besides your lover

6) Carla-Your lovers 2nd choice besides you

7)Lety's Family ( Don Erasmo y Doña Julieta)- Your Family

8) Fernando's Family ( Humberto y Teresita Mediola)- His Family

9) Tomas Mora- Your close friend and/or their view on the situation

10) Omar Carvajal-Your lover's friend and/or their view on it

11) Alicia- What ticks both of you off

12) Jorge Flores, Cuartel de las Feas, Caro- Outside help and/or their view on the situation.

READ FIRST!!!

For me it worked...so idk if it will work for another person.

If you need to know it in spanish i ll put it if not hehe no.

Always remember to clean your cards and never let anyone borrow them.

ENJOY!

something like that the 1 and the 2 from and L as in Love...

juev 23 1 28 am

i ll put up a pic later it works best if you have a love interest

I read my mums fortune...i am good although it took a lot out of me I am not used to all this...its like a forgien dream like its not me but something else...i like it.

btw there is the LFMB spread